[LOG] Hangover Cures

[timetoblog]

There were a lot of things John Watson was used to handling on a very small amount of sleep. He'd been deployed overseas, dealing with bombings and attacks and explosions - he'd been shot, for crying out loud! All of that, however, paled when compared to living with someone as brilliant and as infuriating as Sherlock Holmes. John felt pushed to his limit on more than one occasion, running around London, solving mysteries and crimes, and then coming back to find that he still needed to get groceries, tidy his room, entertain the newly bored Sherlock...

Well, it didn't exactly leave much room for napping. He found himself overtired more often than not, and today was especially harsh, as he was now dealing with a hangover so massive, it put all others to shame. And, as much as he wanted to crash and burn for a few hours in his room, he knew that Sherlock would be along soon enough to draw him out on another adventure. So, when the Welsh bloke - Ianto, he figured, because it was the name that stood out as the most Welsh in his memory - offered an escape route, John had leaped at the chance.

So, there he was, having dug around to find someone to take him to Cardiff - though, was it even the same Cardiff as he was used to? He'd told them who he wanted to see, and that's where he'd been taken, so. Only time would tell if this was his world or not. (And how strange it was to take that concept at face value!) Now, in the Plass - he'd been to Cardiff once, a long time ago, so it was practically like new - John dug out his phone and opened a text to the number he'd by now stored in his address book.

...Right, this wasn't Sherlock he was dealing with. He could call. Rolling his eyes at his own idiocy, he sent a call to Ianto to let him know he was by the (obnoxious? a little) fountain in the center. After all, it was the easiest landmark to be noticed by.

Comments

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto shook his head. "Well, either you just weren't paying attention at the time, then, or we really are from separate universes. Because... The sun disappeared, for a little while. And the stars. It was just sort of dark. Kind...kind of like an eclipse, only for the whole sky." And there were the planets, but if John didn't remember that, Ianto didn't really want to get into it.

He pulled the newly replaced lever, and out came the espresso that he had been brewing while they talked. It mixed with the milk, and after a few moments, Ianto had a perfectly good cappuccino for the other man. He quickly stuck his own mug under the lever, pulling it to simply fill it with straight coffee, before handing the other mug to John. "Here you are, then. A cappuccino. And a very good one, at that, if I may say so myself. It shouldn't be too hot to drink, if you wanted to give it a try..."

[timetoblog]

All... right then. This wasn't John's world. Earlier on in his time on the community and he would have thought Ianto was insane for even saying things like that, but he'd had his share of moments now that proved that anything was really possible. The sun and stars disappearing? Sure. Why not.

So, instead of being skeptical or dismissive or even suspicious, John just nodded. "All right, then, no train home after this, then." He took the proffered mug with both hands, grinning at Ianto's self-assurance. "Do you say so, now?" he asked, amused, honestly expecting something about as good as a Starbucks barrista could make. Taking a sip, he paused.

"That's... fantastic," he said, almost disbelieving.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto smiled, taking a sip of his own coffee, before nodding. "I try to stay a man of my word, whenever possible. I've spent enough time learning how to make coffee and serving it to people that it would honestly be pretty hard not to be good at it," Ianto said, allowing himself to be proud of that fact. It was one of the only things he was really proud of about himself, and so why not indulge a little?

"I hope that it makes up for, well. Any sort of inconvenience or annoyance that I might have caused you. I... I really am sorry for that. It's... It's the community, the viruses and all. I never would've done anything like that, otherwise," he said, earnestly. "Honestly, sometimes it's almost more trouble than it's worth." Almost. "I'm just glad that it ended up being you and not, I don't know, someone that that might've gotten me into more trouble with, really..."

[timetoblog]

Honestly, the coffee more than made up for it, being that it was probably the best he'd ever had, but John saw that pride Ianto was sporting and, well. He didn't want to boost the other man's ego too much. Especially since he'd started an argument over rugby, of all things. "I think it'll do," he said in a fairly noncommittal tone, "As far as apologies go, this isn't half bad."

He quirked an eyebrow at the idea of someone else getting Ianto into more trouble. "Who'd you think that'd be?" He grinned, "No offense meant but if you've noticed, I don't think half of the people on the community would even know what rugby is, much less want to get into an argument over it."

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto smiled, recognizing that John was being that way on purpose, recognizing that he really was enjoying the cappuccino. Ianto was glad. He genuinely liked to serve people, to get these things right. Not for the first time, he contemplated having been a butler or a dresser in an earlier life, for all he got a feeling of accomplishment after seeing to it that things got done in the way they should, and that everyone was happy and the better for it.

Ianto sat back against the counter. "Well, honestly, if I'd picked someone else, I don't really think I would've started an argument about rugby, but. I probably would've picked a fight about something else, and maybe they wouldn't have taken it nearly as well as you did. People can do some pretty stupid things when they're drunk." And when they're looking to vent frustrations, apparently, if Ianto's drunkenly picking fights with strangers was anything to go by. "You'll... You'll have to excuse my behavior. Someone showed up on the community that I honestly didn't think I'd ever see again, and well. It stirred up some unpleasant memories that apparently I had less control over than I might've thought. I'm not... Not usually one to pick drunken text fights with people, as it is."

[timetoblog]

"Fair point," John said, knowing full well how stupid things could be when you were drunk. He had, after all, been stationed with a bunch of soldiers in the Middle East, and then there was university... And weddings. And the bachelor parties that came before said weddings.

All of that had stopped when he'd returned from Afghanistan, but he still remembered. He raised an eyebrow at Ianto's comment, taking another, larger sip of his coffee. "You don't look like the sort, no. So, this someone... is bad, I take it? Or, well. Bad for you. Could be a perfectly nice person, I suppose." Could be someone Ianto'd serial... murdered. Oh, stop it. He was over that, really he was. He was drinking the man's coffee, after all.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto sighed. "No, he's not... He's not bad. He's not a particularly nice person, but he's definitely not bad. He's just... Someone from the past. Someone that died a while ago, but now he's on the community, from the past, and well. It's hard to deal with, is all. It's making Gwen and Jack, my coworkers, pretty upset. They're on the community too, and well. When someone dies, you don't usually expect to see them again, and all, especially well." He motioned around the tourist office. "Especially when you work in a place like this," he lied.

As if sensing that now would be an excellent time to make Ianto look like an idiot, the door to the secret passageway swung open, and Jack strode out, looking down at a contraption in his hands. "Ianto, did you do something to this laser scalpel the last time you used it? I can't seem to get it to..." And that's when he noticed that Ianto wasn't alone. Shit. Ianto had said something about having a visitor, hadn't he. "Whoops," Jack said, sheepishly.

Ianto looked like he wanted nothing more than to disappear in that moment, or to strangle Jack. He couldn't make up his mind which, so he just stood there, clutching his coffee mug tightly, his knuckles white with the effort of not freaking out about this right there and then. Well. Guess the cat was out of the bag.

[timetoblog]

John had just about asked how somebody dead could show up on the community, when - the wall was moving. John allowed himself a moment of bewilderment, staring at the man who looked like he'd just walked out of a 1940's film about World War II, then the thing in his hand, then the wall that had opened up. All of that was out of place in this frankly shady looking tourist office, and the way Ianto's face had dropped, John figured he wasn't supposed to know about it. Which made sense.

Then, he raised a brow. That... "This explains a lot," he said slowly, taking a sip of his coffee before looking from Jack to Ianto. "I thought this place looked a bit skeevy, all the unappealingness, but. That - the whole in your wall, that... would explain why." Okay, so. Thankfully, his time with Sherlock had helped him create an unshakable mask, but he figured he was going to have to let that go in just a minute. Well, then, best be as nonchalant as possible until he turned into a blathering fool. He turned to Jack again, and quirked his lips. "Hullo. John Watson."

[51stcentury]

Jack quirked a smile right back at him, shifting on his feet. If you had to mess up, might as well do it in style, he decided. "Hey, there. Captain Jack Harkness," he said with a smile, in that easy drawling American accent of his. "And well." He nodded back to the opening, leading to the passageway to the stairs and the lift down to the main section of the Hub. "Welcome to Torchwood, I guess."

He turned and smiled at Ianto. "So. I... I guess this is your civilian guest that I was supposed to be steering clear of, then, yeah?" Ianto nodded, his expression unchanging, still clutching his mug in a death grip in front of him. "That... That would be about the size of it, yes, Jack," he said, trying to keep his voice steady and not yelling at Jack.

Jack stuck his hands in his pockets, grinning awkwardly. "Well. At least he's cute. You seem to have excellent taste in visitors, Ianto, I'll give you that much." He sent a little wink in John's direction. Ianto looked like he might just die on the spot.

[timetoblog]

That ingrained bit of learned knowledge they'd given him in the army almost made John salute at the title, but he knew better than to make an ass of himself just then. There'd be time for that in a minute. After the shock of there being a secret... base, he supposed? In Cardiff. Cardiff, of all places.

And it was apparently captained by someone who didn't know when it was appropriate to flirt. And who was flirting with him. A man. Not that that was a problem, it was just. "Right," John said slowly, putting his cup down on the counter. "Cute. Yes." And... there went the unshakable mask. "...You have a secret entrance to, I'm going to guess, a military post. In a tourist office. In Cardiff." He turned his head to look at Ianto, disbelief obvious in his expression and voice, "You're a secret agent?" A pause. "In Cardiff?"

[torchwoodteaboy]

Jack recognized a military man when he saw one, and he smirked as he saw that telltale twitch of John keeping himself from saluting him. He wouldn't have minded, honestly. It'd been a while since he'd last been saluted, after all. "Yeah," Ianto said. "In a very manly, British way," he explained. "Don't worry about it."

Ianto put his mug down very slowly, biting his lip. "I'm...something like that," he said, looking to Jack for permission. Jack shrugged. "Might as well go all out, at this point," he said. Ianto sighed.

"I'm... I'm an archivist for a top secret organization. In a tourist office. In Cardiff, yes. I... We're called Torchwood. I, well. I really don't suppose you would've heard of us, anyway, but. We... We're a sort of specialized organization, I guess you could say. Ehm. Beyond the government, outside of the police and the United Nations and all that. We. We're sort of the resident authority on, well..." God. How to break it to someone that what he'd been trying to pass off as a job for a tourist office was actually a job for a top secret organization that defended the earth against extraterrestrial threats...?

[timetoblog]

"I never worry about it," John said, still a bit too hung up on the whole "secret organization under Cardiff" part of the conversation to really care that Jack had called him anything less than handsome. Dashing would've been nice too, but that wasn't his side of the spectrum. Not that he was paying any attention to words at the moment.

He blinked at Ianto's explanation, listening to how he trailed off and, as any man who had to deal with a mad detective would do, scrambled to pick up the pieces that had been scattered about their otherwise benign conversation. Torchwood, all right. Never heard of it, that's right. Why wouldn't he have heard about it? Their worlds were practically the same. Except for the weird things in the sky. Sun disappearing, stars disappearing. And Ianto was assuming he wouldn't know of Torchwood because... Well. Because it was secret. And also because it had to do with the things he didn't know about, and those things probably meant...

"Ah," he said in comprehension, because really, it had to be either a NASA type thing, which wouldn't be outside of the police, or. Well, something like SETI, maybe? Who knew. Ianto was going to have to explain it - or this Jack fellow. Either of them. ...Lord, if they could. He really should have left a note for Sherlock.

[51stcentury]

Ianto recognized John's 'ah' as what it was--John trying to figure out what the hell he meant by all of it. Honestly, he wasn't surprised that the other man was confused, especially with him rambling on like he was. He was flustered, though. He hadn't really had any intention of bringing Jack or Torchwood into the mix here. He really just had wanted to bring the other man over for coffee, have some pleasant conversation, redeem himself, and then see him off. Had that really been too much to ask for?

"Yes, ehm. Well. You see. There's the Doctor. And well. He met Queen Victoria. When she was alive. And well, she didn't like what he was doing. And. I don't suppose you've met on the community, have you? The Doctor that is, not the Queen. But, ehm. Well. She... She sort of founded Torchwood then, and well. It..."

Jack could see Ianto floundering, flustered, and really, it was charming. He decided that he could step in and pick up the slack, though. After all, it had been his error that had lead to this John finding out about Torchwood, might as well explain himself. "What Ianto means to say is that there's a rift in space and time running through the center of Cardiff. Our job is to keep an eye on this rift and monitor whatever goes into or comes out of it, anywhere from household appliances from the past or future, to well. Alien life. See if it's a threat, and deal with it if it is."

There. Direct and to the point. Ianto winced at how blunt Jack was, and turned to look at John, trying to gauge his reaction to it. If he was going to run, or not. Because the door to the tourist office sort of bolted shut, when the passageway door was open, so. No chance of escape, really.

[timetoblog]

John hadn't exactly been expecting a secret government agency for space rocks or... little green men (that was probably racist, wasn't it?) in this coffee break of his, either, so at least Ianto wasn't the only one out of their comfort zone at the moment. Small graces, and all.

He saw Ianto's wince at the words coming out of Jack's mouth, and John took a moment to process the whole thing. He opened his mouth, then shut it. Scratched the side of his head.

Finally, he said. "...You deal with aliens." He knew that was exactly what Jack had said, and, well. Compared to the ghost ship, the drunken bar full of community members, and the crazy things he saw with Sherlock? It really wasn't that surprising. But still. Everyone he'd talked to, they'd all been, well, from Earth. Or, some version of it. So it would take a few moments for it to sink in.

Idly, he said again, "Really does explain the tourist office being so dingy." He glanced at Ianto, "No offense, the interior's fine." Ever the gentleman.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto frowned at the comment about the tourist office. Alright, yes. It looked awful. But it was a front. And he really had tried with the interior, so at least John had commented on that. He did have to spend a great deal of his time up in this place, so he had tried as best he could with what he was given to make it, well. Neat and tidy and all.

"Yep," Jack said, before echoing John's statement. "We deal with aliens. Got some down in the vaults, if you'd like to come see. They really aren't anything like you'd think. Not most of them, at any rate. Certainly not the Weevils down below. Reckon you could meet Myfanwy, too, if Ianto's feeling up to it."

Ianto took in a breath. He was apparently having as difficult a time as John was accepting the fact that John knew about Torchwood. Maybe even worse, honestly. "I... I could do. I mean. If you're interested. It's well. It's certainly a lot more interesting than anything up here," he said. Alright, yes. He was a little fixated on the fact that John had called out the tourist office on being dingy. He knew it was, but that didn't stop him from frowning at the fact he'd said it aloud.

[timetoblog]

John really was sorry, but it was the truth. He raised both brows at the two of them, realizing a few things at about the same moment. One, Ianto was part of a secret alien... hunting thing, and not a serial killer or something equally as bad (but interesting enough for the community), and Sherlock would probably be sad to learn that. Two, the Cardiff in this world was much more interesting than the one in his own. Three, there were aliens in Cardiff. And, finally, four, which was that he was being hesitantly invited to see said aliens.

"I'm... not sure that's a good idea," John said hesitantly, giving them both a look, "You know, being that you're supposed to be a secret. Wouldn't me actually seeing it be... a little counter productive?" Though he wouldn't mind, he'd also not mind being in the dark if it meant less trouble for everyone involved.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Jack shrugged. "I don't think it'd be too much of a problem. At least I've given you permission, this time. Ianto here has a nasty habit of sneaking people in without me knowing. Hopefully he's learned his lesson, by now." Ianto rolled his eyes. Jack just couldn't let that go, now could he?

"Besides," Jack continued, with a smile, "if you end up being any sort of trouble about it, running around telling people--which I doubt you'll do, Ianto here's an excellent judge of character too, and he's the one who requested permission for you to come over in the first place--then we can just retcon you, and then you'll never be bothered by any of us or this place ever again."

Ianto shot Jack a look. Mentioning Retcon was not reassuring, at all. "You... You really don't have to, if you don't want to. I mean, not everyone's comfortable with the idea of being in the same room as a pterodactyl. What Jack's trying to say," he said, glaring at Jack, before giving John a much more pleasant, apologetic expression, "is that, well. Since now you know, you may as well be offered the option of checking it out."

[timetoblog]

John didn't necessarily know what, exactly, Retcon was, but he had an idea that it involved him not being able to talk about this place. He turned to Ianto as he tried to save face for Jack, who was either completely oblivious to how ominous he sounded or, more likely, he didn't care or even enjoyed it. "He's very good at this reassuring bit, isn't he?" he asked conversationally. Good for Jack, being foreboding and vaguely intimidating, but it really wasn't helping John feeling any better about the concept of there being aliens in Cardiff. (He was never going to get over the fact that this was Cardiff. Wouldn't London make more sense? Ah, well, at least a rift in time and space explained why the Welsh were so backwards.)

There didn't seem to be much of a choice, though. He could say no, probably even just walk on out of there without a problem, but. That would be... would that be rude? Plus, John had to admit. Aliens. That was pretty neat.

"Hang on," he said, suddenly, "Did you say pterodactyl?"

[torchwoodteaboy]

"Yes, he is that," Ianto said, sarcastically. Jack shrugged, obviously not caring in the least how good or bad he sounded to the other man. "At least I asked permission this time. He makes for a better impression when he's not angry at either of us for having you here, really." Yes, he knew that Jack was standing right there. Did he care that he was talking about him right in front of him? Not in the least.

"Ehm," Ianto said, not being able to judge if John was intrigued or just very surprised at the fact that he'd mentioned the pterodactyl. "She, ehm. Well, the Rift works through time as well as through space, so. She just came through one day, and well. We caught her. I trained her as best I could, and now she lives downstairs, in the Hub. We take her out to stretch her wings every once and a while, but you can't very well keep a pterodactyl out of doors, especially not in Cardiff..."

[timetoblog]

"Well, good, I'd hate to have him mad at me." After all, John was doing his best to stay out of trouble. It'd be terrible if he failed at that. Very unbecoming.

He realized that he was stuck in a sort of... well, loop, for lack of a better word. He was forgetting the actual question - did he want to go see aliens and a dinosaur and whatever other mad things Cardiff had beneath its surface? - and he was stuck on all the small details that Sherlock usually decided didn't matter. Well, the relatively small details. "Oh, no," he said, in reference to the idea of a pterodactyl flying over Cardiff, "Can't have that. What would the neighbors think?" Okay, yes. He was definitely stuck on the small things. He really should be answering the actual question one of these days. Turning, he gave Jack a curious look. "How many hostile aliens?" He'd meant to ask "could be running around the UK," but he sort of missed that part.

[51stcentury]

Jack grinned at John's half sentence, trying to figure out what the other man had actually wanted to ask, and failing. "'How many hostile aliens'...what? Do we have downstairs? Not too many. Weevils aren't really hostile, they're just... Well, kind of like big, dumb, humanoid pitbulls. How many have we faced? Quite a few. Everything from Daleks to Cybermen to Sleeper Agents. How many are there that we haven't caught yet? Way too many."

There Jack went with the whole not being very reassuring part again. If Ianto had been standing closer to the other man, he might have given him a well-timed elbow jab in order to make him be quiet, but obviously there was no such luck there. "There... They're not just hostile, you know. Some of them are actually quite nice. Perfectly integrated into society. You wouldn't even be able to tell that they were any different from the rest of us. Ehm," he said, realizing how that might sound, "there's a process. Not every alien that doesn't come through the Rift shooting things ends up being able to stay. Only the ones that show the most promise in becoming an upstanding citizen of Planet Earth, really."

[timetoblog]

Quite a few, right.

Okay.

John silently reminded himself that this wasn't his Earth, not really, and so the chances of there being aliens running amok in his own life were stunningly small. Unless Sherlock was an alien, but no. That really wasn't possible. Right? God, okay. Focus on the here and now. He looked at Ianto. "...So, you're... the UKBA for aliens. Right. Got it." Which was simplifying the matters a bit too much, and he knew it, so he added, "Not exactly, I know, but. Go with it, yeah?" Because he really was going to have to come up with an analogy to make this make sense, and if Jack or Ianto took that from him, so help him...

"And," he said after another pause, "You've got aliens in the basement, and a pterodactyl, and you pretend to be a tourist office so nobody bothers you. And," he finished, because this was him bringing himself around to the beginning, "You're okay with telling me all this and showing me any of it." Right?

[51stcentury]

Jack cocked his head to the side. "Well, yeah. I guess you could say we're kind of like the UKBA. But, well. Mixed with MI5. We're kind of the only line of defense here, so. If something comes up, it's pretty much on our shoulders. And UNIT, but there's way too much bureaucracy involved there for the two of us to really have any sort of affiliation. We're private run, paid for by the crown, don't have to follow orders from anyone else and we'd like to keep it that way."

Jack shrugged. "But yeah. I mean, you don't seem to be much of a threat. I can spot the military background from here, so I know that I can at least trust you for that. I figure, well. Why not? Since you're here."

Ianto tried his hardest to soften just how strong Jack was coming off, there. "Well. What he means to say is that... Jack's my boss. He's sort of the one in charge in all of this. So, if he's given you permission, then yeah. It's alright to show you around. Whether to the cells, or to Myfanwy, or...to the archives," which was exciting, but definitely less so than aliens or dinosaurs. "It's up to you, though," he said, although Jack probably wasn't going to give him a choice, now that he had a chance to show off.

[timetoblog]

While John wasn't familiar with UNIT, he had the gist of Torchwood now, and now he could move on to feeling slightly put out that his soldier's attitude hadn't completely dissipated. Not that he wanted it to, it was just one of those things people noticed right away, if they knew what to look for. Sherlock had, and now Jack. He was being blunt and really, so was Ianto, but at least it was better than trying to dance around the issue. (Though, that would be hard, being that the issue was the still open secret passageway.)

Really, though. He'd be an idiot to say no to the chance to see what they were talking about. He'd also be an idiot for saying yes, but that was the cautious part of him that was slowly letting go as his life went on, farther and farther away from Afghanistan.

He decided to say as much. "I'd be a bit of an idiot to say no, don't you think?"

[51stcentury]

Jack shrugged. "Sort of, yeah. I mean, it's not every day that you get a chance like this. It's not every person that I mess up in front of and accidentally let slip what Torchwood is exactly. You should be feeling lucky now, kid," Jack said, using the term despite the fact that, well. Jack really didn't look at that much older than John himself, if he even looked older at all. He started back the way he'd come, through the corridor, before calling after him, "C'mon then! We'll go down to the main level together, and then Ianto can show you around from then."

Ianto sighed as Jack turned the corner, before turning to John. "I'm... I'm sorry about this. Well, Jack, and all of this. I, ehm. I really hadn't intended for Torchwood to come into this at all. It's a bit too late now, though. Best not keep him waiting, he hasn't got the best patience out there, I'm afraid."